Life as I am learning it.

11 04 2012

Every day I have important decisions to make.

  1. get out of my bed; (harder than you would think some days)
  2. cry whenever I have to. (although I try to do this in private)
  3. lean on God more than I lean on my friends. (He always has my back)
  4. pray for others (so many friends need prayer)
  5. re-model my 20 year old kitchen. (which I am loving!!)
  6. take control of my diet. (Ugh)
  7. balance work and pleasure. ( say what???!!!)
  8. cherish family time whenever it is possible. (looking forward to all the fam coming in town)
  9. eliminate the drama mammas. (puh-lease)
Widowhood is not for sissies. It takes some learning and God knows I am trying. I miss Ed every day and, truth of the matter is, it is not getting any easier to be without him.
My work has been a life saver. I just completed an independent film starring Greg Kinnear, Jennifer Connelly and Lily Collins. The title is “Writers”. It was a fun show to work on. I did Greg and Lily’s hair and Patrick Schwarzenegger among others. You will be happy to know they were all very nice.
I love the work I do for television and film. It is not always easy to keep it in proper perspective though. There is a weird sense of urgency to always find the next job. Insecurity runs very high in this industry and lends itself to the feeling that every job finished could be the last job I will ever have, which is complete nonsense. God is my manager and my booking agent. He opens doors that no one can close and closes doors that no one can open. He has put me in some pretty cool positions and He is not done yet. Knowing that helps me to relax and let Him do what He does best; take care of me.
I am actually taking some time off on purpose to spend a week with my family. We rented a house on Topsail Beach and all the girls, SILs and Grands are coming in on Saturday!! The house sleeps 12 and we will fill it. I am so excited to see everyone together. The weather is going to be fabulous, in the 70s and 80s. God is smiling on us right now. Coincidentally, our family time is going to be during the one year mark since Ed passed away. The mere fact that we will all be together on that day is a God thing. I did not plan it that way, it is when the beach house was available and the school vacations worked out. Ed is smiling on us too.
Many pictures will be taken. 😀

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