I can hardly believe it. Just last year I would not have even thought it possible! After all, I am 56 years old!! I was perfectly content with the idea of never having another and then… it happened. Ed is so proud.
I am expecting my new MacBook Pro to arrive before Christmas.
Come on, like you wouldn’t be ecstatic too.
We need another’s opinion. This is our choice for our christmas cards. Which one looks better? The top one or the bottom?
Ed and I were talking about the summer that our oldest grandson, Tony, came for a one month visit. He was about 6 years old and he lived in Hawaii with his Mom and Dad. It cost a pretty penny to fly him to the east coast so we kept him for a good long visit. We had a great time together. One of the things we planned was a trip to Six Flags in NJ to meet his aunt, uncle and cousins.
Tony was a good traveler. We packed a picnic lunch for the first day of our trip. We stopped along the way at a nice rest stop and had our meal. Some where along that trip, we were listening to the radio and the song, Hit the road, Jack started to play and we all started singing along. A little while later, Tony piped up from the back seat.
“Noni”, he said. “From now on, I want you to call me Jack.” So, I said, “OK Jack.” Hey Jack, would you please roll your window down?” “Hey Jack, would you please pass a soda up front to me and Grampy?” I was just trying to think up stuff so I could call him Jack.
Then I said, “Since you are changing your name to Jack, I want to change my name too.” He thought that sounded like a fun idea and he said “Sure, what do you want me to call you?”
I said I wanted to be called Precious. Silence from the back seat. After a moment of deep thought, he stated in a matter of fact tone, “Uh, you can just call me Tony.”
I love being called Noni. There are a select few besides my grand children that call me by that name. That is special to me.
This is my most favorite film project ever. We had the best time making this series of American Experience. I am glad it is Thanksgiving so I can post more pictures of We Shall Remain. Pilgrims. Wampanoag tribe. Massasoit.
Gratitude. There was a time in my first year of sobriety that I didn’t think I was going to make it. I was severely depressed. Everything out of my mouth was a complaint or a whine on it’s way to becoming a complaint.
One day, my sponsor told me I should sit down and make a list of things that I am grateful for. Really? Wasn’t she listening? My life was not even worth the breath it took to keep my body alive. I thought she had completely lost her mind! It had to be Divine interference that made do it. In fact, I remember asking my newly found Higher Power to help me find something to write down. An hour or so later, I called my sponsor back and I actually had a list to read to her.
Thirty one years later I have a different list. Here it is , in no particular order.
That’s it for now. There are more and maybe I will add them later. For now, it is good to remember all of these. See, I am in a time of transition again. I am not sure of the direction I am going in but I have vowed that I will go where God leads me. He will give me whatever I need to accomplish what He has designed me to do. All I have to do is be willing. I am.
At the end of my drinking days, I had a daughter who had just turned 4 years old. I was on Welfare and working in a bar room as a bartender / bouncer. I was fired for beating up the customers and drinking the profits.
God’s mercy endures forever.
Through God’s amazing grace, I was able to get sober in AA. The home I lived in at this time was a rickety little cottage. Cold air came whistling through the gaps around the windows in the winter because the house had settled in to the ground many years before I moved in.
God’s mercy endures forever.
As “one day at a time” turned into months of sobriety, my brother-in-law rented me his cottage which was in much better condition. I began to watch sober people raise their children around me and I tried to emulate their good parenting. I failed more times than I care to admit but I never gave up trying to be a good parent.
God’s mercy endures forever.
Counseling became available to me along with my working the AA program. My counselor entered me into a state run education program to assist me in finding a career and getting off of welfare. The Academy of Cosmetology that I wanted to go to was 45 minutes away from where I lived. I had never learned to drive and I had no car.
God’s mercy endures forever.
My mother paid for me to go to driving school and get my license. My AA sponsor loaned me the money to purchase a vehicle that would get me to school. I bought an old beater that had no heater, no air conditioner and a leaky radiator. I carried 2 jugs of water in my trunk at all times to replace whatever water the radiator misplaced.
God’s mercy endures forever.
The temperature in the winter was often in the teens. No heat, no defroster. I wore a huge Army parka with a fur lined hood that I found at the Salvation Army. I pulled over every few miles to scrape my frozen breath off the windshield and pulled my hood over so I could see to take a turn.
God’s mercy endures forever.
I graduated school and began a career in hair styling. I am married to a Christian man who loves me and serves Jesus with his life. My daughter has grown into a beautiful woman with a Godly husband and children who are a blessing.
God’s mercy endures forever.
Today, I am clean and sober for more than 30 years. I am a hairstylist in the film industry. I am employed right now. I have health insurance and my health is pretty good.
Dear Lord, Please do not ever let me forget where I came from. Keep me ever thankful for the blessings You have provided for my life along this journey. Remind me that You have gone before me and made a path for me to follow. Thank You for leading, and sometimes dragging, me along the way.
Forgive me when my heart becomes hardened with disappointments. Forgive me for the times that I think of me first and You last. Soften my heart again.
You have been so good to me. Thank You that Your mercy NEVER fails and that Your love continues forever.
This is a little bit of what it looks like when a film crew descends upon an otherwise peaceful setting in order to film a TV series.
This is the crew of One Tree Hill getting set up for some scenes down by the third street bridge. The guys set up the equipment and we waited for it to get dark because this portion of the story takes place at night.
It was one of those nights that I got to see a beautiful sunset over the Cape Fear River.
I love living in Wilmington.
The temperature had dropped drastically by the time we neared the end of the scene. I am grateful that we had a warming tent to retreat into.
This is what my world looked like one day this week. It was my first full week of working as the second hair stylist on a TV series. Although it was not a difficult week, I am still happy to see Saturday come. That means the alarm did not go off at 5AM! I am spending the day pampering myself. My hair has been colored and hi-lited, I took the longest, hottest shower ever and then put on a clean set of ‘jammies. Oh yeah, it is jammie day for me. I am also taking time to write a post, listening to music and checking out Facebook. Who knows, I might even cook dinner for Ed. More likely we will go out to eat.
BTW. Be careful when you ask me to post more pics, Angela. LOL.
There have been a lot of changes in my life over the past 56 years!
When I was a child, my imagination took me places. When I read a story, I became the lead character and shared the adventure in my own mind. I had a dream of what I wanted to accomplish and who I thought I would grow up to be.
When I was a pre-teen, I lost trust in people and did not know who or what to have faith in anymore. I became sad and lonely and withdrawn.
In my teen years I felt unloved and a victim of my circumstances. Rejection was so deep that it became a physical sensation and began to rule my life. Rebellion began to infiltrate my thoughts. It was my reaction to the instability I always felt. It opened me up to becoming a victim of violent crime.
Bennys, marijuana, LSD and alcohol were the deceivers that I relied on to make the inner pain go away. In truth, they only masked the pain for a time. When the effects wore off all the emotions came back again with the burden of guilt now added to them.
Young adulthood became my time to pay the fiddler. Many times I wished to end my life so the confusion and pain would cease. I had become my own biggest disappointment. I was unable to control my own behavior. Promises made to myself were now being broken by me. Hope was a vapor.
BUT God. He had a plan for my life. He infused me with dreams when I was a child. He wept over the things that happened to me. He did not allow my suicide attempts to succeed. He did not allow the dangerous events that might have resulted in my death to succeed. He never took His hand of protection off of me completely even though I squirmed to get away from Him.
When I had spent every bit of my own energy and self will, He was there for me. He was waiting for me to find Him again. He never rejected me. He never gave me over to anyone or anything else. He never gave up on me. He is the hound of Heaven who never lost sight of me. Like an echo bouncing off the walls of a canyon in the distance, He was calling my name. Destiny would not be thwarted. At long last, I heard Him. I surrendered to His love for me.
My life journey took a whole new path. I was able to dream again. He had a plan for me. A plan for my good, not for my destruction. Breaking addiction. Breaking harmful mindsets. Removing fear. Unveiling a healthy self worth. Birthing in me a realization that God loves me and that makes me worthy.
I have had to let go of some dreams because they were in the way of where God is leading me. He has a plan for me. I am not finished or perfected yet. I am not exactly sure of where this path is leading me but THIS I know:
I have had this condition for days now and I am determined to break it tonight, so fasten yer seat belts cause I have no idea what’s coming.
Hey, What do you call a deer that has no eyes?
A no eyed deer.
What do you call a deer that has no eyes and no legs?
Still no eyed deer.
That is how scary it is in my head right now. A lot has been going on and I have been trying to make a decision about work. Starting last Friday, I began a full time job. It is a blessing to be working in this time of economic uncertainty and the schedule is not as grueling as some jobs I have had in the past. I am doing this on a trial basis until December 19th. If my boss is happy with me and I am still able to do it, I will continue working on this TV series until the spring. One day at a time. I am trying to bloom where I am planted.
That’s all I got.
Hi, everyone!
I am so excited to be a part of this amazing event! Soles4Souls has thrown out a challenge to raise enough money to provide 50,000 pairs of shoes in 50 days to those in desperate need!
No one knows when life will hit hard or where a disaster will strike. One day you have everything you need; the next you may only have your life. A pair of shoes can help people begin the rebuilding process. Shoes not only bring hope, but in millions of cases they can save lives. It is estimated that Americans have 1.5 billion pairs of unworn shoes lying in their closets while over 300 million children around the world have never owned a pair of shoes. This is an opportunity to “Step Up” and to help Soles4Souls with their mission of “Changing the World, One Pair at a Time” with “One Click at A Time.”
About Soles4Souls
Nashville-based Soles4Souls™ facilitates the donations of both new and used shoes, which are used to aid the hurting worldwide. Since its inception, Soles4Souls has distributed more than 3.5 million pairs (or one pair every 23 seconds) to people in 61 countries, including Honduras, Romania, Thailand, and the Sudan. The charity has been featured on CNN Headline News, NBC Nightly News with Brian Williams, ABC News, FOX, CBS, and hundreds of regional outlets around North America. Soles4Souls is a 501(c)(3) recognized by the IRS; donating parties are eligible for tax advantages. Visit www.giveshoes.org for more information.
There are a couple of ways you can help – first, GO HERE and donate $5 (or more). Every $5 you donate will buy 2 pairs of shoes for someone in need. Next, help us spread the word! You can re-post this on your blog or GO HERE and you will see “Spread the Word.” That is where you can get your blog widgets and banners. You can save them off the site or if you click on the one you want, it will give you the code to copy and paste.
I’ve donated personally and it would be great if you all would help meet the goal of 50,000 pairs in 50 days!
Here is another idea of how we can give AND give again. There is a place at the end of your order where you can donate in someone else’s name. At Christmas, in my workplace we usually give a small gift to each other or pick a name of one person to give a Christmas gift to. This year, I will give 4 pairs of shoes in the name of my co-worker. Seriously now… that is $10.00 well spent. How many times have I searched for some meaningful $10.00 gift? Come on, we can do it! Be sure to leave me a comment and let me know if you’re on board!
Thanks, everyone!
I am not in church this morning. This feels really weird. My ADD brain is spinning with thoughts are coming faster than I can think them through. It is like a roulette wheel, marked with thoughts, has been spun in my head. I am going to put on the brakes and stop on a random thought and make myself elaborate on it right now! Umm… right after I make myself a cup of tea. Be right back.
Friday afternoon I did something to my back. It started to hurt pretty bad but I still had one more shampoo, cut and blow dry to do. Common Sense told me to call my next client, who is also a pretty good friend, and tell her that I can’t do her hair. Ah but the Wonder Womanspirit who dwells in the recesses of my ADD brain, would not allow me to do it.
“Shut up, quit being a baby and do what you said you would do. Cut the hair and then rest.”
By Friday night, I could not stand up straight. The pain in my back and on my left side was all consuming. My posture looked like the haggard old witch who gave Snow White the lovely red apple. No comfort was to be found whether sitting, standing or laying on the couch. A couple of moments of relief came when I lay on the floor, on my back with my knees bent. I am still hanging on to a cough from the chest cold I had last week and coughing made me see stars!! “Oh look… stars.”
Poor Ed gets so upset when I am ill or in pain. He doted over me a little but he knows that I don’t like it so, he resigned himself to the computer room and got lost in writing his book. Smart Ed.
I used an ice pack on my back, took 3 Advil, shifted from walking from room to room, laying on the couch and laying on the floor, praying for Divine healing the whole time.
My chiropractor, Dr. Shaver, is not open on Saturday and Sunday but I called the office as soon as I got up on Saturday morning anyway. I left a message and figured they would try to work in me on Monday. To my delight, I got a call back from Sherry. She takes care of the front desk and does the scheduling. She told me it was a “coincidence” that she had to do something at the office on a Saturday but she got my message and had already called the doctor. He said that if I was in distress he would make a trip into town and open the office for me.
Wonder Woman started talking her smack to me again. “Don’t you dare impose on this man’s weekend! He has 5 children and this is his family time.” Thank God, Common Sense told her quite firmly to “shut up” and thumped her on her power banded forehead with a sound “I could have had a V-8″ thump.
Ed drove me to the office to meet Dr. Shaver. I dressed in the back injury uniform; loose pants, slip on sandals and a tee shirt. The Dr. proceeded to tell me that it was a lucky coincidence that I found him at home. (I am loving these coincidences) He was supposed to be out of town for the weekend but cancelled at the last moment. He did his blessed magic on my skeleton and, viola, I was able to stand upright again. However, both he and Ed recommended that I do not go to the wedding on Saturday afternoon. Common Sense heartily agreed with them.
I am still in pain and following his instructions on this Sunday morning. Ice pack for 20 minutes a few times per day, do not sit still for too long (not that I could if I wanted too), walk a little bit to keep things loosened up.
Guess where I will be on Monday morning? Yep, at the Family Focus Chiropractic offices.
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